Leviticus 8:35 Basically this verse says that Aaron and his sons had to stay at the entrance to the tabernacle for 7 days and do whatever God told them to do. If they didn’t they would die. That’s pretty serious… I suppose though, that they were to be the spiritual leaders of Israel so it was imperative that they be able to recognize God’s voice when He spoke to them. So, if they failed the test during their initiation into the priesthood, they died. At least, that’s how it seems to me. I don’t think I’d pass that test! So often I feel like I have no idea if I’m hearing God or if I’m hearing something else – like my desires or thoughts. I know people say that if I spend time in God’s Word I’ll learn to hear His voice… but I’m still pretty clueless. I guess I have some idea of some things that I get while reading, but are there people who audibly hear His voice? That I’d like to know. I think it would be amazing to hear His voice… but maybe that would be too much. Did He speak more clearly to people back then?
Deuteronomy 2: 16 “When all the men of fighting age had died,…” When the Israelites wandered in the desert, they wandered until all the fighting men had died. Once all the warriors were dead then God said it was time to conquer the Promised Land… What?! So, God waited until the only people left who could fight were men and boys with no fighting experience… and then decided to go and conquer a land filled with giants and kings. Wow. Talk about making sure the Israelites had to trust God. I guess they didn’t have much in the ways of strategy either since they had no experience. With me, I guess that God is waiting for me to stop fighting and admit that I don’t know anything about what’s going on. I don’t have experience here so why do I keep insisting my strategy (or whatever this blundering is called) is right? Maybe God holds me back from the Promised Land of His plan for me until I stop trying to be a warrior and let Him be in charge. When I finally let Him lead, and follow His battle plan (even if it seems crazy – like being silent while walking around a HUGE fortified city for 7 days before yelling and watching the walls fall down) maybe things will be smoother. I’ve never understood His ways of thinking. Maybe that’s why He’s the commander, not me. Now, if I can just remember to stop squirming and fighting and let Him be God.
Proverbs 3: 9 Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce. 10 Then he will fill your barns with grain, and your vats will overflow with good wine. The BEST part of everything is like honoring him with the first part. The best is usually the first part, the initial part – it’s freshest. Then God fills me up and meets my needs. In another version it says our vats will overflow with the finest wine. Like when God turned water into wine at the wedding – he didn’t turn it into decent wine, it was the finest wine at the party! He doesn’t skimp on quality when he blesses His children. He gives the BEST.
“Honey is tasteless to a person who is full, but even the bitter food seems sweet to the hungry.” Proverbs 27:7 Honey is tasteless to a person who is full – I think that sometimes when we are greatly blessed, we are full metaphorically. Life is sweet and we are content. There is no hunger. And sometimes, this is the time when we forget the sweetness of God. Or rather, perhaps the sweetness of God falls on satisfied tastebuds and is not remembered. Rather we forget how wonderful His gifts are. BUT, then there comes a time when we are in times of refinement, and although it is a bitter pill to swallow, it is sweet to know that God is working to make us more like Him (yeah, sounds great in theory, right – but it’s a lot harder in practice!). As we hunger to learn and to know Him better, the bitterness of our circumstances is made a little sweeter.
“As for God, His way is perfect.All the Lord’s promises prove true…” ~2 Sam. 22:31a All His promises prove TRUE. This is the crux of my doubts lately. Do His promises prove true for everyone or just some people. I guess, at my pity party and narrow point of view, it seems that I hear amazing stories about God answering His promises… but when it comes to my life, I don’t see this. I’m probably too close to the situation (forest for the trees?), because I know God’s answered a lot of prayers in my life. It just often seems that the promises hold true for THEM, but not always for ME. Selfish, huh? Maybe God’s trying to get me to look past my narrow scope and remember that His ways are waaaay above what I can guess or imagine. So, I don’t understand, but that doesn’t mean He lied. Lemony Snicket put it this way: “Just because I don’t understand, doesn’t mean it isn’t so.” Good words from a great author! Anyhow, God is perfect – so He can’t lie. Therefore He is true… and everything He does is true – including making promises.
John and I have been going through some pretty intense financial issues, and recently our church did a series called “The Blessed Life” from the book by Robert Morris. It was incredible, as was the book. Although we had been tithing, it gave us a totally different perspective on what we were doing and not doing… so we made some changes in how we did things. And things got worse… both kids and both of us got sick, one in the hospital resulting in lost work days and wages, both were home from daycare (which we have to pay for whether they go or not), and it just seemed to keep coming. Finally, after being thrown up on for the 5th time in one day, I lost it and I got mad at God. I told my poor husband that it seemed like God must hate us. We try to do the right thing and He throws us under the bus. Does He love us like He says He does? Does He keep His promises in the Bible (like the ones that promise blessing, etc.)? Is He even paying attention to us (it certainly feels like were being ignored)? He, of course, was just as frustrated by the situation and he didn’t have any answers, either. For a couple of days I really questioned God, searching for some kind of answers or justification or something that would explain what was going on. I didn’t find much. But, I heard a song by Barlow Girl with a verse that said, “I’m about to let go, and live what I believe, I can’t do a thing now, but trust that you’ll catch me.” That pretty much became my motto. I know from past experience that God is real – I have no doubt about that. But, I don’t know that He’ll catch me. And right now, there’s nothing I can about our situation at all. So, do I live what I believe – that God is who He says He is? So, I let go. I believe that He will do and be who and what He says He is. I don’t understand; I really don’t get it, but I know what I believe – that He is God. So, I live it even if I don’t understand and hope that someday, He’ll make it make sense. SO, that being said, this is The God Hunt. Who is God? What is He like? What on earth is He up to? This is my quest, my search, my question, my Hunt.